Well, here it is. The death of a fond friend. Spring Break is over and we all must return to school tomorrow. (Arkansas) I imagine the only ones with a smile on their face in the morning will be the parents and the weary babysitters that have had to tend to these people the last week.

Looking back at Spring Break, I didn't get near as much accomplished as I had hoped to but I did get in some well needed rest. Due to my injury to my posterior, lifting was totally out of the question. Mopping was a chore. I am starting to feel like I can do a few things but when I stoop down and start to get back up..... YOWL! It is painful. How did I become injured you might inquire? Well when you turned 49 one day, the next day is not the day to show the 5th and 6th grade boys you can still hang on the basketball court with the best of them. Dribbling down the court was no problem, but when I left my feet to become airborne for the layup.... that is when a fifth grader decided to show me his football skills and wham! There was nothing to land on by my back side on the concrete.

The boys quickly ran to my side and asked "Are you ok?" My response, "No."
"Do we need to get an ambulance?" Again I answer "No."
"Do we need to get a teacher?"
"No."
"Then you're ok."
"uh, No."

I lie there a while longer while one of them extends his arm for me to press all of my weight on and rise to my feet. Fighting back tears, No fighting back an ocean of tears, I wait until I can call time to go to lunch.

When I finally get them to lunch, I am thinking now I can go cry and make my owie all better.

But NOOOOOO, the boss wants to have a talk.
And what he wants to talk about, I don't like the sound of.
Pretending my tears are all about my pain, I cry and I cry and I cry. The pain in my backside caused some of my crying but not all of it.
What I hear, breaks my heart. I am suppose to smile and be happy. Not just when he gets done but for the next rest of my career. I am suppose to smile and act like this decision is just dandy. I'd like to tell him all I know about a particular situation, but that would be looked upon as jealousy. Either he will figure it out or he won't.

So, I smile and act like I am happy. And whose to say I won't eventually be happy? I always ask the Lord for whatever is best. Sometimes the Lord and I don't always agree, but I have to rely on faith and his will. Right now, I can't talk about the way I see things or feel about things. It is so heartfully painful. I feel so mistreated. Given 27 years and someone give 4 and their desires out weigh yours. I know there is a bigger picture out there and I can only see for the the little while. I know the Lord is doing what is best for me.

So I will smile and be happy.